DEPARTMENT OF UNFORTUNATE AFFAIRS
OFFICIAL PUBLIC SERVICES PORTAL · FORM FORM-AWARD-014
DECLASSIFIED CIVILIAN RELIEF

Officially Unlucky Person of Interest

FORM CODE: FORM-AWARD-014 · CLASSIFICATION: Special Agency Rewards

STATUTORY BENEFIT SPECIFICATION:

"Confirms the Department is aware of the bearer's situation and has chosen not to intervene."

AUTHENTICATED FORTUNE COOKIE SLIP:

"You are under administrative observation. We will not help."

LUCKY NUMBERS: 404 · 503 · 502 · 500 · 200
CLERK #404 ADMINISTRATIVE REMARK:

"We are monitoring your case with profound disinterest."

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